Boulder Constellating Systems Days (CO)

booking takes you to your investment options (80.00-150.00) <> payment alerts me to your booking <> your confirmation email arrives shortly thereafter <> detailed logistics below

Humans are often beset by heartbreak from countless sources. Lifelong change and loss demand that we find the capacity to live beyond assaults and neglects, carrying fragments and shards of our selves until they find integration (again). The degree of emotional and physical pain we experience reflects the magnitude of what has been lost. Fortunately, heartbreak also serves as a clarion call to awaken, reimagine, reinvent, and take action.

All too often, we find ourselves paralyzed by shock and grief. Many of us have been taught that suffering is a sign of weakness, neediness, or brokenness. Bereft of ears to listen, eyes to see, and arms to hold us, unknowable pain settles deep within our bodies, infusing our minds and shackling our souls.

In the absence of a space to express our distress, we revert to habitual ways of managing our emotions. We repeatedly say “I’m fine!”, adapting to relational, familial, social, cultural, and political expectations. In short, individual and collective pain, both, are abandoned, left to fester in the dark.

Unmet pain, over time, congeals into bitterness, then anger, and ultimately violence. Our responses to pain have crystallised into a cleaver that breaks, and continues to break across generations, the connection with our bodies, with others, and with the world at large. An epidemic of personal and systemic trauma, longtime in the making. We are left without knowing how to to mend the tattered fabric of our systems, which in turn deprives us of collective wisdom.

Yet, we long to be seen and heard when lament is due. We crave the dew of tears on our cheeks and yearn for communal tears to well up in response. In the presence of an other our the courage to feel ‘what is’ inevitably reaches implicit and silenced vulnerabilities within us. Shared tears become a gift; just as shared joy and laughter are. Indeed, tears are the dew that buds connection among those present. Alongside tears, our anxieties, self-doubt, shame, fear, isolation, and loneliness can, then, more safely surface.

Stepping toward our ailing core—in community of (initial) strangers—requires guidance, skill, and sometimes a gently offered gaze. Others with similar lived experiences provide that supportive seeing. Listening to stories of neglect, violation, exclusion, and absence meets our own story (whatever it may be.) This prepares us to process survival adaptations we needed earlier in life to draw curtains over pain. Tears, and the delight of togetherness (yes, we also laugh hysterically), nourish courage. They allow us to meet and mend whatever broken connections arise from our invitation.

In short, participating in a Constellating Systems Circle is a practice of receiving another’s pain while dignifying their experience. It requires a commitment of your time and attention. It offers unique opportunities to stand in an other’s shoes, while representing a part of their systemic issue (sometimes, near literally). This embodied experience of otherness expands personal experience and can even reshape worldviews.

Participation gifts withnessing to each of us, amidst a desert of generationally fabricated pain avoidant separation.